I’m starting to pick up the pieces.

So I’m stopping my negative progression while it still hasn’t affected me irreparably. I’m not sure that last sentence is grammatically correct. Bertrand Russell really said it right in a little video I got. I’m feeling anxious about getting my approximately 900 dollars back from Garden State Apartments. Once I get this evidence I need to present it to my lawyer. I’m getting so anxious about going through this whole process. It’s 500 dollars. I make that in two weeks with less effort. The point is that they shouldn’t get away with this, right? If I don’t get the entire fund back it doesn’t matter. The point is that they go to court and go through the process for being unfair. Ahh. I have stuff going on already. I just don’t want to deal with this. Apathy is the number one cause of dominance. I have to care. Blah.

Anyway, focusing on school again. Reading more. Watching less TV and trying to be cleaner. I should work out. 🙂 It’s not that hard to be a great person. I just need to stop being apathetic and stop being lazy.

Difficult questions. Do i want to stay in the band? No. I’m gaining nothing from it now. I want to start saving up for a car. I want to start attending art performances. I want to connect with CS and Mathematics community. If I ever wanted to do something with music there is always Lucas. I want to know what I want and I want to fight to attain what I want. I need to be smart and prepared for this. I need to have all the angles figured out and I can’t let myself be defeated. I need to move.

I want to be reliable first and foremost. All other things stem from that. I want to do well in school second. I want to be entrepreneurial, clever, in my subjects. Then I want to be as intelligent as I can be. Then, I want to focus on my community. Then I want to be cultured.

This way I will be sure to work to my full extent at what I want. I will get some money by producing something. I will be smart and pass my intelligence genetically and behaviorally. And I will be helping my community out, tremendously.

Discipline I have to develop that skill. and Responsibility. Two things that make someone reliable.

That’s that. I started working on school but I have to work on being better in general. I will attain it because most people attain what they for work for. I’m no exception. Till next time

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